Trust is something I am no stranger to writing about here on my blog…however, a stranger to experiencing, that’s another story.
But, I’m learning.
I’m learning to trust myself: my instincts, my intuition, my intelligence. My desires & my hopes & my dreams.
I’m learning to trust those I love: actually loving them. Believing they actually love me & want the best for me. Going to them for prayer. Allowing them closer to me, past the walls I constantly feel the need to put up.
Most of all, I’m learning to trust God, more than I ever have before. Seeing how He has made all things come together, knowing that even in the hard times, he is right next to me, never letting me fall. Never letting me completely break, even though I feel like I’ve bent as much as I could. To trust that even if I make a choice that may have been the “wrong one”, He will transform it for the “right”.
Like, after ending with the Airman, I know my brain wants to tell me: “That was it, you ruined it, there will never be anyone else. At least, you won’t find anyone who is a God-lover & God-follower in a strong way.” – But, I am choosing to trust that those thoughts aren’t the truth, because God has something that is His best in mind for my life. Even if it means I remain single, there is His best in store, even currently happening, in my life.
This is one of the facets of being His Beloved: trusting Him.
Trusting His people.
Trusting the dreams He puts inside.
I have no idea what the future holds: single or taken…California or Washington (or somewhere new entirely)… License or PhD (or neither)… My current ministry or a new one… Writing more books or just keeping this blog…
But, no matter what unfolds on the path ahead, I can clearly see His working in my life already, and I know that pattern will not change.
So, I can trust that His best is always in store in my life.
(And, honestly, I really don’t want to be single forever…so, we’ll see what happens there…)
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding
In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”