Time for some real talk…
Back in September, I was diagnosed gluten sensitive. After nearly 2 years of not knowing what was wrong – I have an answer. (One I don’t like, but an answer).
So, for more than 6 months, I’ve known the biggest cause of my stomach woes. Yet, I keep in this cycle of gluten free, and then allowing some back in my diet (and then suffering because of it, so back to gluten free).
With this cycle comes all the horrific side effects: headaches, irritability, increased anxiety, major digestive issues, and more.
Each time I say I won’t do it again, then, a week or two later, there I go on a gluten binge again.
Monday night, as I found myself desperately in the presence of my Abba, in a world of pain after a stressful and heartbreaking day, which followed one of these binges (due to lack of time/access to better choices), realizing how often we are like this in our spiritual lives.
I was so desperate for His word & comfort because of the magnitude of my negative feelings – a terrible day at the office. But what of the rest of my recent times?
Well, netflix, work, & other “obligations” have kept my attention.
And, it’s this way with our sins, too, big or small. We think “never again”, and then the enemy comes in and tempts us once again. And, we cave. We give in & feel the convictions followed by “never again” promises that fall flat.
Though, it isn’t always just sin. Notice I put netflix first on the list? It’s where all my time seems to have been going when time isn’t accounted for by something else. Then again, that makes it an idol, huh? Now, we’re right back at the sin…
So, how do we get out of the cycle?
Well, obviously, I’m not good at that part yet. But, I can tell you:
- First, we decide – really decide – never again. We make a real, conscious choice to actually change the behavior.
- We repent. This means a complete 180. A turn from what we once did, and to a new way of behaving.
- W pray. On our own, the cycle never ends. He is our strength. He is the only way the cycle ends.
- We surround ourselves with Godly accountability. Again, we cannot do this alone. Godly accountability relieves some of the pressure, and gives us people to rely on.
- We extend and accept grace for ourselves. Not as something to take for granted or take advantage of, but to genuinely extend ourselves grace and accept His grace. We will mess up. It will happen (especially early on). So, we pick up & we move forward.
Hopefully, I can do this – both in my physical need (gluten-free) & in my spiritual needs (God always priority).
And, if you find yourself stuck in that cycle, I pray you can also break it and really put God as your priority.
Let me know below if there are any ways I can pray with/for you in this area.